Canada's tariff strategy: buy different ketchup; We found the fountain of youth and it's name is creatine; Shark and Dragons battle for Canada
3 Things this week and a trailer
Thanks for spending some of your weekend with Things I Wrote Down. In Canada it seems like most conversations end up in a chat about the trade war. So, this week I'm leaning in. There's too much news to keep track of, but I pick two hilarious outtakes below.
Here are three things and a trailer.
1. Canada's tariff strategy: buy different ketchup
Negotiation is all about leverage. And, when you go up against the guy who wrote The Art of the Deal, who is back in the seat of Most Powerful Person in the World, you can’t show up to the table without it.
This week Trudeau signalled he’s going to hit Trump where it hurts most: in the condiments aisle!
Yes, this week our interim, officially-resigned Prime Minister punched back at the US and its threat of 25% tariffs on all Canadian goods by suggesting Canadians no longer buy Heinz ketchup.
That's why we will look, as we have in the past, at things that have replacements for Canadian consumers that wouldn't be tariffed. The example from last time [the trade fight in 2018] was Heinz's ketchup being replaced by French's ketchup because French's was still using Canadian tomatoes in its ketchup.
~ Justin Trudeau, quoted by CTV
You wanna tax our oil exports? Think twice, because if you do… we won’t buy your ketchup!
But there was just one problem.
Heinz, one of the biggest manufacturers in Canada, uses only Canadian tomatoes in its Canadian-made ketchup, which are harvested in Leamington, Ontario. Over 1,000 Canadian workers work the line to get the ketchup in those bottles and onto grocery store shelves. As it turns out, the factory where it all happens is in Quebec, Trudeau's own stomping grounds.
Oops! My bad.
Perhaps in his current position as former-turned-interim leader, he doesn’t have the staff to do research.
I’m blushing as red as one of those juicy Leamington tomatoes right now at the thought of how this must look to the world. And gotta admit, not feeling much confidence in the negotiations thus far.
This week we're learning you don’t bring ketchup bottles to a multi-billion dollar, national sovereignty gun fight!
2. We found the fountain of youth and it's name is creatine
How much creatine do you take a day?
If you don’t, sounds like maybe you should. Every fitness bro on X is talking about it (which may be a reason not to take it 😅). So it’s really piqued my curiosity.
Studies seem to show it has many benefits, not only for strength but also brain optimization and cardiovascular health.
What even is it? Here’s some background on creatine (from the Cleveland Clinic). The naturally occurring substance in your body helps skeletal muscles flex and comes from protein-rich foods.
If you’re a doctor reading this I’d love for you to weigh in. Or, if you take it daily, I’d love to hear: Creatine yes or no?
3. Shark and Dragons battle for Canada
But back to the trade war. It’s not a good sign when all the official and unofficial spokespeople at all levels of government are bickering and disagreeing (and doing so publicly).
This week the battle of ideas over how to stop the annihilation of our economy, how to find some self respect and perhaps a back bone—not to mention all the hand-wringing over whether we hit back with tarrifs of our own or go a more diplomatic route—spilled over into the kingdoms of Dragon and Shark.
Dragon Den star and investor Arlene Dickinson criticized Shark Tank star Kevin O’Leary for meeting with President Trump at Mar-a-Lago.
If he was negotiating on our side, that would be totally fine. But he’s not. He’s negotiating against us. So I don’t think it’s a helpful solution right now.
~ Dickinson in the Calgary Herald
February 1, the day the Trump administration has said will see the US put massive tariffs on Canadian exports, is coming quickly. We need our federal and provincial leaders, along with our billionaire investors, to squabble less and table better solutions.
Re-opening Parliament could be a first step in the right direction.
A trailer - The 49
Here’s a short trailer for The 49, the new fictional series I'm releasing week-over-week on a new Substack. It's one of my creative ventures for 2025.
The series imagines a time in the not-too-distant future when billionaire fiefdoms arise and the old alliances crumble. The map is remade and the wall so much discussed in the south pales in comparison to the cement and drone wall separating Corridor West (a massive stretch of geography from California to Alberta), from the rest of what used to be North America. I've been toying with the idea for awhile. Now it seems too close to reality!
New content drops each week, and the audio version is available on The 49 Podcast, which you can listen to on all your favourite platforms. Join the adventure!
